I am not ready.
Right, I know…probably shouldn’t open a post calling myself out. I’m looking into this weekend and FitClub competition in Columbus OH with 180 athletes and this is the first thought that comes to mind: I’m not ready.
I love competition. There is so much to be gained putting yourself out there, pushing further than you’ve ever gone, measured against people you’ve never met, accomplishing feats that you wouldn’t accomplish in your regular training. But this is competition – anything is possible. I’ve been embarrassed by not being able to complete toes-to-bar (T2B) and I’ve PR’d my deadlift by 20lbs. Each experience will stay with me – both integral in my Crossfit journey – but I grew more from that embarrassment and today I have T2B in the bag.
Now some people say if you’re not going to win why compete? Well, I’ve run marathons and never considered winning. I’m a competitor not a winner. Middle of the pack is fine with me! Not the bottom, not the top – just blend in, baby! Most of all, I’m three years into Crossfit and I’m competing against myself. I ask myself: How did I manage my energy? Did I push myself hard enough? Did I give it my all? And most importantly, did I support my teammates?
It’s a careful balance between coach and worker-outer (I’ve never called myself an athlete). There will be growth this weekend, camaraderie with my teammates and another personal weakness (a goat) will rear its ugly head. I will take it all in stride because Fall Brawl, hosted by R.A.W. Training, is coming up in October and I’ll be back for more!